I say that I "turned into a pumpkin" when I’m having the side
effects of chemotherapy. The doctor adjusted the dose of one of the chemo drugs
because I got nail toxicity as a side effect. Anyways, today I lost my first
fingernail (I say first because I have symptoms with others as well). I must
confess that this bothered me more than losing my hair. I don’t know why. Maybe I’m getting tired of looking
for the bright side of the chemotherapy. It is a pretty stinky stuff.
But I thank God for His care and the tremendous love and support
from those around me.
My dad sent me a picture of his nails to remind me that when
he started his dialysis process he also lost his fingernails. But they grew
back. So, this is just part of the process…and it will come to an end.
Some friends asked me if my head has not fallen off yet. They
made me laugh and I remembered it could be worse.
My daughter tried to fix the situation with bright colors
and her love.
I'm learning that we need to let ourselves be loved. I would
have missed these expressions of love if I didn’t share with them what was
happening to me. It's okay to be a “pumpkin” some days and it is a blessing to let
ourselves be loved.
Becky
All rights reserved. Rebecca Parrillaa. June/2015
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